How to Help Yourself, a Friend or Problem Drinker
There is no specific formula on how to spot a problem drinker.
However, there are some red flags to watch out for in a friend as well
as in yourself.
- Unable to stop drinking once they start
- Thinking about alcohol on a regular basis (i.e. when they can
drink next, how they will get alcohol, who they will drink with, etc.)
- Doing things while drunk that they would not normally do while sober
- Repeating unwanted drinking patterns (continuing to drink despite getting repeat negative consequences)
- Surrounding themselves with people who drink and activities
where there will be drinking while avoiding those who do not drink and
activities where there will not be drinking
- Increasing their sense of denial that their heavy drinking is a problem because they are successful in other areas of their life
- Setting drinking limits (i.e. only having three drinks or only drinking on the weekends) and not being able to follow the limits
- Driving while intoxicated
- Always having to finish an alcoholic beverage
- Using alcohol as a reward
- Binge drinking often
- Having chronic blackouts (not remembering parts of or an entire evening of drinking)
- Feeling guilty about things they said or did while intoxicated
- Having friends or family members tell them they are worried about their drinking and should cut back
If you know a friend (or yourself) who has one or more of these red
flags, you may want to talk to them about their use. It is important to
remember that your friend will probably be in denial of his/her situation
and may become defensive. Here are some tips on how to structure your conversation:
- Talk to your friend about your concern without blame or judgment.
- Be as objective as possible. Don’t get pulled into an emotional debate or use vague examples; be specific about your concerns.
- Use "I" statements, not "You" statements. "I’m afraid you will
get kicked off the track team if you miss more practices" or "I’m
disappointed when we can’t spend time together because you have a
hangover."
- Don’t preach, blame, judge or give advice.
- Listen without interrupting.
- Be flexible… allow room for solutions that can work for your friend.
- Don’t expect instant results. It’s hard to predict how your
friend will react. Even if they don’t want help now, you may have
planted a seed in their head that they might have a problem.
Remember, even though you see your friend's drinking as a problem,
they probably do not. If you are still worried, you can talk to your RA
or Residence Life Coordinator. You also can meet with a therapist at
the counseling center for a consultation session. These sessions are
confidential and you do not need to give the name of the person you are
concerned about.
Getting Help is Easy
When calling to make an appointment regarding your own alcohol or
drug use, please state your concern so we can schedule a session with the
appropriate counselor.
First-time appointments are scheduled for about 60 minutes so that
students can more fully explore their concerns, thoughts and feelings
with a counselor. These appointments are usually available within 5 to
10 days by calling 216.368.5872. For privacy and security reasons, UCS
cannot schedule appointments via e-mail.
After hours, weekends and holidays, contact the UCS Counselor On-Call
at 216.368.5872, or go to your nearest hospital emergency room.
If you think that you or a friend may be experiencing alcohol poisoning or a drug
overdose, do not call the UCS Counselor On-Call. Call Case Police at 216.368.3333, dial 911 or go to your nearest hospital emergency room.