Learn When to Say No
By Mandy Martin, English, Class of 2011
The summer before college, I was most worried about meeting people. So, I got involved. Very involved. One month, three positions, and several hundred students later, I finally realized that I had nothing to worry about.
Ironically enough, one of my biggest problems is that I tend to over-commit myself to organizations. Through my involvement with campus organizations such as RHA, Greek Life, Residence Life, and The Observer, leadership opportunities are always available, or I am often asked to pick up the slack for others. I have difficulty telling my friends, peers, and supervisors that I can comply with their requests. Sometimes it is impossible for me to allow others to do something because I don’t quite trust them to do it right. I had countless stressful nights of a busy schedule of programming and emailing, several weeks of at least 3 nightly meetings after classes, and two jobs to squeeze into my schedule. I often got headaches. My grades slipped, and I became a downright unpleasant person (drastically opposite of my usual personality). That’s when I realized that I needed to stop saying “yes” to everything that arose. I started slowly at first. I gave excuses and apologized profusely. I even felt guilty when I said “no” to a task that was unreasonably asked of me or something that I certainly had no time for. Then, after a few weeks of doing this, something clicked. Being able to say “no” allowed me to focus on the tasks that I did undertake. As a result, I produced better schoolwork and projects for my organizations. As another plus, my headaches stopped, and I went back to being my normally happy self.
Although I am still overloaded by school and work and groups, I have learned a lot from my experience over the past two semesters. I have learned how hard it is to balance on that thin line that is time management—it is something that needs to be practiced and perfected. I have also learned the value in saying “no.” Although it may seem like a negative response, I have more control of how much work I take on and the quality of what I complete. Most importantly, however, I have found my own balance. I learned how much work I can take on without it affecting my health, happiness, or peace of mind. And nothing—not homework, clubs, or programs—is as important as that.
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